Welcome to the Muskingum Coshocton Water Trail

I think it's swell that parts of the Muskingum have been designated as a water trail. It's nice to see government officials using existing natural assets and spinning them as tourist attractions. But a thought occurred to me...wouldn't say a water trail section for gondolas be more tourist enticing than a canoe or kayak? You can find canoes and kayaks everywhere, but where are the gondolas? Doesn't the thought of gondolas bobbing up and down in the gentle Muskingum waters just make you feel all warm and squishy inside? With singing gondoliers, we would have a little bit of Venezia right here in the heart of eastern Ohio.

Let's spice up things a little bit, eh? Instead of regular canoes, let's get outrigger canoes with authentic Hawaiin tour guides. We could feature tribal drumming and luaus. Instead of a lei and a mai tai, you'd get a bowl of sauerkraut and a shot of Jim Beam. Who knows, we might be able to score a Don Ho imitator for the 1st Annual Coshocton Outrigger Canoe Festival. Now, that's something I'd pay for.

How about a nice glass bottomed tour boat? "Ladies and gentleman, if you look directly beneath the boat, you can almost see my granddad's '53 Chevy and if you glance to the left you'll see the famous Muskingum buck toothed fish."

Also, we could establish a water trail living area; something like "Uncle Clem's Houseboat Trailer Park". "On your next vacation, choose Uncle Clem's Houseboat Trailer Park. You'll get beautiful river views, free swimming, and plenty of fishing. All from the comfort of a swanky houseboat trailer. All bedrooms come with mosquito nets. Located on the Muskingum/Coshocton Water Trail".

Think of the possibilities.